Hiatus over.
Must get back to writing. In honesty, there is no one factor that has hindered my daily blogging, but yet a conglomeration of excuses, explanations and rationalizations.
I'm too tired, I don't feel well, I don't have enough time. The dog ate my computer. I was kidnapped by aliens and am still recovering from the anal probe.
All bullshit. All petty. Though some of these excuses may be true they are merely dissembling prattle, meant to distract everyone from what's really going on.
I am overwhelmed by difficult questions and uncomfortable emotions and am unable to be honest with myself about all this, nevermind putting it in writing. I am facing questions about my sexuality, my intimacy retardation, my mental health, food and my general self worth, among others. I feel broken, ugly and don't want to be exposed for the weak girl that I see within.
So bear with me. I will get there. I will begin tomorrow anew with the intention of being honest with myself and perhaps recording a glimpse of said moments to share. I want to share and I want to let others in, to be vulnerable. But wanting and doing are far more distant relatives than I imagined.
Until tomorrow...
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